Allotmenting For Emos

It has been a long, hot, sticky, stormy week,  yet I am still wondering why it's so late already and why I haven't managed to do all the things I wanted to this weekend.

A lot of people are doing lists of positive stuff lately.  I am pretty positive most of the time, but for some reason that's been a challenge these past few weeks. Well, I do like a challenge.

Last Friday was my dad's birthday.  I clubbed together with my siblings to get him a pressie and we all headed over to the Black Country to spend time together. I made him a card featuring an embossed foil carp swimming through green fronds and proudly wrote Happy 70th on it. Only this seemed to amuse my dad, and he giggled about me having gone back in time.  I thought he was teasing me for being a science-fiction nerd, but apparently not.  Did I not remember the celebrations from last year?
 Erm, no... . What not the restaurant? No.  Not the massive cake? No… and I still can't.  Even if I'd got massively drunk, I should surely remember something!  But no... no recollection at all. Either my family is playing a massive joke on me or I have been making far too many series of Quantum Leap. Oh boy.

Positive thinking regarding the above: a missing memory surely leaves more space for creative thinking.  "What a great 70th birthday you had, Dad. I had no idea you  were an old friend of Paul McGann and Richard E Grant,  but it was so nice of them to turn up to your party and bring the finest wines available to humanity. And cake!"

Also last week, I went to my writers’ group where I had to stand in for OH who had submitted a story for feedback, but had been called to work so couldn’t go. The irony is, I haven't written anything myself besides this blog for weeks. A few jokes about shopping that I've got no idea what to do with. I suppose I've used my creative time to make cheese and yoghurt, but it's not the same...

Anyway, it was great seeing my writing group chums. There were a few people missing, and we got hounded out of the pub by Phil Collins. Not literally... they were just playing "Another Day in Paradise" at a level to make you wish you couldn't hear it even more than you already did. So we sat in the beer garden, enjoyed the sunshine, and discussed screaming homophones, as you do.

Positive thinking: okay, so I've been depressed and knackered and generally crap, but going to writing group at least gives me the push towards impetus that I need to get on with stuff. Almost there...

It's a fantastic group; we've had loads of individual successes and I really relish the support I get from my friends. Plus, for now at least, we get to meet in the beautiful Saxon village of Earls Barton, or as I like to think of it, the set of gentle Nick Frost comedy, Kinky Boots.

 

 

 Perhaps it's a metaphor, but gooseberry bushes have some blooming big thorns. I have been very lucky this week in that my bro invited me to his allotment to help diminish his enormous glut of gooseberries. Ably assisted by a five-year old, we tackled the bush with gusto and now I have about 5lbs of gooseberries and an awful lot of scratches down my arms. I think it's the sort of pain that booze might heal...

*searches for recipes for gooseberry wine*

Positive thinking: I have berries, and the suntan cancels out the emo arms.

Live Below the Line Day 3

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has donated so far to my Live Below the Line Challenge. I'm over the target I set myself already. And if you'd like to donate and haven't done so yet, you can do so here.

Let's buy that cow!

Hope you all had a nice trip to the voting booths today. I liked reading some of the ridiculous party slogans on the ballot paper. "NOimmigrants NOeu NOsomethingelsefascistinlowercaseandoneword"
Oh well.

Yesterday was a much better day. I had the same things to eat for breakfast and lunch yesterday, plus a drink from the machine. I went to meet my writing group last night (they were discussing a short story of Rod Rees's and my novel's first chapter), so I microwaved my dahl and rice at 5.30 and smuggled it to eat upstairs on the bus on the way there. Naughty me.

Of course, my writing group meets in a pub...

Picture me salivating at the prospect of cider! Amazingly, I was fine with my water. I think I was dizzy enough from the lack of food.

Except, I manged to eat a sufficient amount yesterday. How did I achieve that? Well, I had a sneaky second bowl of porridge when I got home and used my pear to sweeten it - this was fine. Who needs extra sweetener?!

What this did though was push my Weight Watchers Points over the daily allowance for the first time this week.

Look at all those smiley faces!

Here's the boringly meticulous MyFitnessPal stats:

(and with that, statto fans, I'm off to bed).

May 21, 2014

Foods	Calories	Carbs	Fat	Protein	Cholest	Sodium	Sugars	Fiber
Breakfast
Milk - Whole, 3.25% milkfat, 100 g	60	5g	3g	3g	10mg	40mg	5g	0g
Sugar - Sugar, 2 tsp	30	8g	0g	0g	0mg	0mg	8g	0g
Porridge - Porridge, 50 g	186	17g	2g	2g	0mg	0mg	5g	1g
Lunch
Kingsmill Medium Sliced - 50/50, 2 slice	188	33g	2g	8g	0mg	320mg	3g	4g
Sainsbury's - Cooked Ham Basic Slice, 1 Slice	15	0g	1g	2g	0mg	245mg	0g	0g
Cucumber - With peel, raw, 0.1 cucumber (8-1/4")	5	1g	0g	0g	0mg	1mg	1g	0g
Lettuce - Iceberg (includes crisphead types), raw, 2 leaf outer	11	2g	0g	1g	0mg	8mg	1g	1g
Dinner
Sainsbury's Basics - White Rice, 100 g	351	78g	1g	7g	0mg	0mg	0g	2g
Sainsburys - Yellow Split Peas, 100 g	104	17g	0g	8g	0mg	0mg	2g	5g
Garlic - Garlic, 0.25 clove	1	0g	0g	0g	0mg	0mg	0g	0g
Vegetables - Red Chilli, Raw, 2.5 g/1 chilli	2	0g	0g	0g	0mg	0mg	0g	0g
Aldi New Season - Frozen Mixed Vegetables, 80 grams	39	4g	1g	2g	0mg	9mg	4g	0g
Spices - Cumin, 1 tsp	8	1g	0g	0g	0mg	4mg	0g	0g
Onions - Raw, 0.75 medium (2-1/2" dia)	35	8g	0g	1g	0mg	2mg	4g	1g
Snacks
Porridge - Porridge, 50 g	186	17g	2g	2g	0mg	0mg	5g	1g
Milk - Whole, 3.25% milkfat, 1 tbsp	9	1g	0g	0g	2mg	6mg	1g	0g
Pears - Raw, 1 pear, small (approx 3 per lb)	81	21g	0g	1g	0mg	1mg	14g	4g
Vending Machine - Hot Chocolate, 1 small cup	90	18g	2g	0g	0mg	0mg	16g	0g
TOTAL:	1,401	231g	14g	37g	12mg	636mg	69g	19g

The Long Haul

Apologies...

Apologies, dear reader, for my absence. Life suddenly got very hectic. I have been doing so much work in the evenings I've not had time for my blog. Neither have I had a lot of heart as some of our financial plans were thwarted by unforeseen circumstances. Dur du-duuur! I see this blog as being about positivity, and need to be in a chipper frame of mind to write that way, hence I didn't write. However, plans are adjusted following our disappointment, so the mood lighting of this scene is a tad warmer and accompanied by some soft jazz. Chill... everything's gonna work out just fine...

Hello, hello?

 

Hello new follower, Bruce! Welcome.  I promise it's not always this chaotic round here. 

I am a Horror Writer. Welcome to my Darkplace...

Author... Dreamweaver...

What a couple of weeks I have had!  Over in writer/editor/science fiction land I have been working like crazy. A short  story has been finished and sent to my editor for publication a little later this year,  and I have been busy with BSFA Award stuff too. They will be announced next week. Editorial work has been taking up most of my time, though. I'm currently working on a memoir for a private commission at the moment which is very intensive, but the old East End character of the writer's voice shines through, so I'm thrilled to be helping with what will be a lovely and unique family heirloom. 

Over on the Northampton Science Fiction Writers Group blog, co-Chairman Ian Whates has summarised everything we've been up to in 2013. It already looks like this year is going to be even busier. Except I'm not getting married again. Apart from that, really, really busy.

One thing OH and I are getting up to this year is script-writing with comedian Tom Young, the purposes of which I will keep shush for now. Very excited about this project though. A clue... it's pretty geeky.

If Your Name's Not on the List, You Might Still Be Able to Get In, I'll Just Check...

I have also been bouncing again.  This time for Robin Ince, who this time came to NN with Jo Neary (who I performed with in the old Fishmarket a couple of years back),  George Egg and Grace Petrie. What a marvellous night! Robin was doing his Dirty Book Club - like the Bad Book Club, only more sexah.  My verdict: very, very funny - all of them. I  love Grace Petrie's songs, too; I have been listening to her for a while.  Also, I got to try maple bacon as cooked by George Egg. Egg does bacon pancakes very well. This might sound like I was so impressed with the acts I ended up staying for breakfast,  oo-er, but it was an act thing and I don't want to describe it in detail,  as you may very well go and see him do it,  which you should. 

Robin Ince: dressing like he means it.

I've Seen Bigger...

I have also been complaining. I'd like to say my complaints were always as successful as this one. You know about Mars' recent health-drive to save us calories? Well, they've improved the recipe and downsized their chocolate bars. Very worthy, and I can't argue with that. But I did take exception to paying for a load of air.

But I got an apology from them - their cutting machines had cut my bar too short they reckoned. And a sweet £2 voucher. Get in!

Scratting About

I also gained 25p in 'Found money' this week for my Sealed Pot Challenge. I put a quid's leftover change in 20p pieces into OH's much depleted Doctor Who DVD collection, and earned my first Quidco cashback. 69p. Better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick!

  

I Appear to Have Gone Bananas

 So, I left you on a bit of a cliffhanger.  What did I do with the rest of the bananas? 

Well,  I made chutney.  So you can breathe now.  Right after you've stopped spluttering.  Banana chutney? Yes indeed.  Very lush it is too. 

 

*Imagine here a picture of the actual chutney I haven't taken yet*

We're talking 8s and 9s here

 I used: 5 overripe bananas

1 wrinkly Golden Delicious

8 pitted chopped dates

1 red chilli (this was a yellow sticker buy)

3 really small onions from a  savers bag - one medium one would be equivalent

pinch salt

250ml white wine vinegar

100g soft brown sugar

1 tablespoon ground ginger

Really was as simple as frying the onions and spices, adding the fruit and vinegar, then the sugar, bubbling it away for a bit, then storing it in jars as you would jam. I sterilised my jars first, and added a greaseproof disc to the top of the chutney. This stops the metal tainting the chutney. Then, to properly seal, I boiled the closed jars in some water for a few minutes. A great way of using up fruit that's no good for eating as fruit anymore.

Beautiful and Wonderful Things in the Post -BSFA magazines

I felt a huge surge of pride when I opened the post on Monday and saw I had received copies of Vector and Focus  - the magazines of the British Science Fiction Association, of which I have been Chair since June. 

Fantastic cover art by Kev Rooney

Of course, I've always thought the magazines were pretty ace; Vector is the association's critical journal and features some great articles and critical analysis concerning contemporary and classic science fiction - mainly in literature. I sometimes write reviews for it, but haven't got anything in this issue (in the next one I have). I'm particularly looking forward to reading the features on Adam Roberts' and Stephen Baxter's work... picture me later with my feet up and a pot of Lady Grey on the go and some Elizabeth Shaw mints to nibble (rescued from a party... nobody wanted them. Nobody wanted delicious minty chocolate!!! What is the world coming to?).

I've popped Focus foremost in the piccie though because I'm particularly proud to have had the chance to be involved with the editorial work. Guest editor this issue was the fantastic writer Kim Lakin-Smith (my Matron of Honour at my wedding this year!) and the cover features a plate illustration for a new edition of her gorgeous first novel Tourniquet. The artist, Kev Rooney, is from Northampton and is a creator of beautiful gothic artwork and stories. I quite honestly think it's one of the best writing magazines out there, and the current issue focuses on writing groups.



My byline! Mostly Kim's...

Kim, Kev, Shana, Alex, Steve, Clive and all the contributors to the magazines... awesome job!

In frugal news:

• I went to my brother and sister in law's house to deliver a birthday present and came home with two courgettes from their allotment and boxes of raspberry and chilli tea. OH and I are now fighting over who can grab the most tea. We love this tea! Thanks, bro!
• I made an amazing pie from the free apples I got from said same allotment the other day. I used a Good Housekeeping Dutch apple pie recipe, but used almond essence instead of vanilla as I'd run out of vanilla. Looked ugly as it exploded from the glut of apple filling, but was very yummy.
• Getting ready for Christmas... used my Cokezone points which were going to expire on 15th to grab a sporty present suitable for a young nephew. I had been going to get makeup, but they'd stopped the offers already. Too bad as I smashed my foundation and blusher on Saturday by accidentally dropping them. I endeavoured to rescue as much foundation as I could, only to realise I was smearing tiny little particles of glass onto my face. Not recommended. Best thing about the Cokezone points - they were mostly gained through picking up litter in my messy street. I am a litter-picking hero! You threw money away fools! Almost as good as  the time I saw a guy deliberately throw an unwanted receipt on the floor of a petrol station - only it wasn't a receipt, it was his tenner change! You didn't want it, I'm having it, foolish man!
• Number of homemade birthday cards made this week so far - two.
• After a discussion about blogs at the weekend, I promise never to waste time or resources on bunting. Sorry if you like bunting.
• Trigger warning! Also, apparently people can become enraged at the sight pictures of food, so sorry for the below, which is indeed of my lunch. But I made it myself out of very cheap ingredients: olive oil bread was made using Carrs breadmaker (I don't have a machine; I am my own breadmaker) brown bread flour - currently on offer in Sainsbury's at 80p for 2kg, which works out at around 15p for a 1lb loaf. Quite yummy too - just switch olive oil for your fat in a regular quick wholemeal bread recipe, and knead in oil instead of dry flour, and it picks up the lovely, rich olive oil flavour. That's served with carrots and a yummy mushroom and bean pate. This is using up beans left over from another recipe. I know brown sludgy stuff isn't everyone's idea of yummy, but I like it. It's basically half a tin of black-eyed peas, drained (currently on offer 4 for £1 at Sainsbury's), plus about 1/4 pack basic mushrooms, chopped in large chunks and cooked down in a pan (97p punnet), 28g of cheddar (offer 800g for £5.00), and salt, pepper, sage and parsley to taste. Whizz together in a food processor until slightly coarse. This makes 4 good portions for 35p. Whole lunch here cost around 16p!
  
  

Paper plates make lunchtime feel like a party - yay!



Ooh - and I may be able to do a bit of copywriting using Textbroker as I've been accepted as a 4* writer. Cool!

Pride and Injury

I was doing well on Parkrun this week until....


OOOOOWWWWWW!!!!

Something went wrong with my knee. It seems I've done something to a tendon inside my knee so it only hurts when there is downward pressure applied - i.e. when running.  I limped the last third home and still did it in 30 minutes, 30 seconds. I may have ruined my legs and not be able to run anymore, but I'm faster, dammit! Er...

Hopefully some exercises will sort it.

I was also advised to go cycling, so I took my bike over to my brother's and went to help him with his allotment. I say help... I stood and caught some apples he threw down from the tree. And thanks to his generosity, now I have some cooking apples! Pie or chutney...? Chutney or pie??? Mmm...

This weekend, OH also did some cycling for cheridee. 50 miles, in fact, in aid of Cynthia Sylvia Hospice. And to get to the start point, he had to cycle 7 miles too. So, well over 60 miles in total. I am so proud!

Brave, selfless, sweaty...

And in fame, fame, fatal fame corner, I've done an interview for the Northampton Science Fiction Writers Group website, so head over there to read about how I became I writer, and stay to read about the other folks in our happy band. Also, if anyone knows the story I'm on about, please let me know.

In other frugal news, I made some bread. Looks okay, haven't tried it yet.

Poetical Performances, and Stuff on the Web.

Next weekend, I will be performing at The Bardic Picnic. It's a free festival of music and spoken word, and it's held in the grounds of the beautiful Delapre Abbey. It's also where the annual competition is held to find a new Bard of Northampton - I was the very first one back in 2009. It's run entirely by volunteers; if anyone would like to help out, do get in touch with the Bardic Chair, they'd be very glad of the help.

It's always great fun... there are vegetarian food stalls, beer, crafts - and this year a fancy dress competition to find the best Green Man or Woman!

I am especially excited as this week, the headline act has been announced, and it's a lady whose work I have admired for years - Joolz Denby!

I've previously been to see Joolz perform at a couple of places, including with Red Sky Coven a few years ago, and I think she's brill.

I am not performing very often now, as my freelance work keeps me too busy, but I love this festival, so I'm really happy to have been invited to perform here.

Here's the flyer for it.

Science Fiction-wise, I've done a write up to advertise the forthcoming Andromeda One convention on the BSFA blog, with quotes about the Edge-Lit con that took place earlier this month, so that you can get a flavour of just how good one day conventions can be.

Also, there's been a lot of activity over on the Northampton Science FictionWriters Group website recently, as my talented friends are getting their work out there. I had a little piece earlier this month about my single publishing success this year. I really need to find more time to write, but I think a lot of freelancers must be on holiday or something as I'm pretty busy. Too busy to pen anything myself apart from the odd blog post. Boo.

Frugal Brownie points this week go to my OH, who made a lot of pea and bacon soup for us for pennies. I know, it's a bit hot for it, but still. My frugal win was getting train tickets cheaper by comparing across different websites and buying singles instead of a return ticket. My frugal fail was cider in a beer garden on Friday night. I am going to be FAT at 40... boo.